Looking backwards, and forwards...

I am starting this bog on January 1st, 2011, but before I get started with my plan from here I want to review what's been before. These pictures shows me at close to my heaviest weight of all time (left, 382.2) and my current weight as of today (350.6), a weight loss of 31.6 pounds over about a year and a half's time. At my heaviest I was a size 30 pants, had bad back pain when I would try to walk for more than 5 minutes, and felt terrible all around.

I have tried many times to lose weight in the past, but had trouble sticking with any exercise plan for long enough to make a big difference, and my diet, well, it's an area I struggled with too. I'm vegetarian but I wasn't doing a good job of eating a balanced diet with natural foods and keeping my calories under control. Plus, I struggle with emotional eating & depression, and when I would go through low periods I'd hit the ice cream harder than I care to admit. But the evidence was all over my body.

Here's a graph of my weight record from about age 22 to 30.

I've kept notes on my weight over time, sometimes with more frequent measurements than others. Always hoping that I would start seeing the numbers go down. When I got above about 300, the scale I had at the time wouldn't work anymore so I would only have an occasional data point when I went to the gym at school and used their electronic scale or something. Watching the numbers go up and up over these years I've felt alternating desperation and resignation.

I think I was first told I needed to slim down when I was about 9 or 10. Looking at pictures of myself then, I don't see a chubby child. In my eyes I am lean and athletic looking until around that time, and then when I started developing I got a little chubbier. Nothing extreme though. When I graduated high school I was about 180. Somewhere I have a record of all of those numbers too, because I was always self conscious about my body.

But this blog isn't going to be about looking backwards, it's going to be about looking forwards. I'm about 30 pounds down from my heaviest, so I'm moving in the right direction, but that came off over about a year and a half, and I really want to kick the rate up a few notches now that I feel like I'm on the right track.

I don't believe in weight loss pills or surgeries or any quick fixes. What has been working for me so far, and what I intend to keep doing more of, is increasing my exercise and making healthier food choices that I can live with for the rest of my life. I'm not on a diet, I'm changing my lifestyle.

So, on this blog, if anyone ends up reading this, I'm not going to try to sell anybody anything, or convince you that one method is the best. Nothing like that. This blog is going to help me with keeping my motivation up and accountability. And if someone can pick up on something that's working for me, and it works for them too, great.

Here are some tools I've been using so far:

- Group aqua-aerobics classes (especially at the beginning when walking was very painful)
- LoseIt! iphone/ipod app to track my diet and exercise, and their online community for social support
- Fat2FitRadio, a podcast I've been listening to that has very healthy and reasonable philosophies about losing weight gradually and permanently
- Exploring new recipes online. I learned to bake growing up, but didn't really know what healthy cooking looked like until the last few years.
- The Gym - I got a low-income discounted membership at the YMCA. I mostly walk on the treadmill and sometimes lift weights there. I'm trying to increase the amount of weight-lifting.

And here is my plan for the coming year:

What & When:
1 year goal: to 250 lbs by this time next year (that's a 100 lbs weight loss over 1 year)
that's almost 2 lbs per week
3 month goal: 325 by 4/1/11
6 month goal: 300 by 7/1/11
9 month goal: 275 by 10/1/11
non-scale goals: more energy, clothes fitting better & smaller sizes, more confidence

Weekly goals:
no more than 1 meal "out" per week
increase protein to at least 20% of calories, then re-evaluate
cardio - 3 times per week, weights - 2 times per week MINIMUM

Why (Things that will happen if I don't lose weight and get in shape):
Continuing shame about my body
Diseases associated with weight like diabetes and arthritis
Decreased lifespan
I may never have children
It will be hard to find a partner

How
Weight Training - 2x per week no matter what
Cardio - at least 3x per week
listen to Fat2Fit radio consistently whenever they come out
preparing most of my meals in advance
eating more "negative calorie foods"
eating a lean protein with every meal
keep going with loseit or other support group
Update this blog regularly with my progress