What now? (2011 Week 16 Update)

I lost 0.4 pounds last week, if you go by literal numbers. I did just over 3k calories worth of exercise, mostly working in the garden and cleaning house. Protein consumption could be better (only about 70 g per day).

I was pretty much right on target (only 200 calories under) with my budget, but I haven't been doing a very precise job of calorie tracking -- I mean, I do log everything I eat and try to get the portion sizes correct but the actual food substance might not be an exact match. I think usually when I do that it is close enough, or erring on the side of more calories than I actually ate.

I'm still struggling with mama drama, and some of the stuff that she says is super insensitive. When I call her on it she claims she didn't realize it was making me upset and then scoffs and says she shouldn't have to censor her thoughts for my benefit.

I got really anxious about having some house guests visit last weekend. I felt like I was being super awkward the whole time, and I worried that they would think my place wasn't clean enough.

If I had to sum up the last week in one word it would be anxiety. Job interviews, house guests, two exams, etc. Sometimes I handled it well (cleaning, reading a book, watching tv), others I didn't (pint of ice cream, choc chip scones, donuts, shopping).

Today I am meeting a friend at the park; I am trying to be more social. When I get home I've got a lot of chores to do, but it will feel really great when they are all done. On a happy note, my tomato plants have their first tomatoes on them! And my squash are coming up!

Pretty frustrated... :-/ (2011 week 15 Update)

Over the last week I was a total of 2,200 calories under budget (pretty much all from exercise; I was aiming to meet my calories right on with eating). I got an estimated 3700 calories of exercise between housework, gardening, yard work, walking and biking. And I gained 2.2 pounds.

It's that time of the month so I *want* to not read too much into it, but at the same time, looking at my charts over the last bit here, it has definitely become a trend:

I have definitely felt like I've been doing all the right things for the last week. And I guess it was the week before that I was really pushing to get back on track again.

I'm not sure what else to do here, so I guess I'll just give it a little more time and try to keep being consistent.

Stupid Weight Loss Contest!!! (2011 Week 14 Update)

I took a closer look at my weights since the new year versus my goal (at a rate of -2 lbs per week, hah!) and up until early March, I was doing fine. Up until I started that stupid, stupid weight loss competition with my two girlfriends I was doing pretty well, and then I started *gaining* again (on a 7 day moving average, so it should eliminate any non-meaningful wiggles).

I was about to say "I can't think of anything else in particular that was happening around that time", but then I realized I could go back and see if I made any other notes on what was going on my life. At the beginning of March, I got that interview canceled that I was really counting on. And then my mom's comments comparing my eating habits to my friend's. And then my mood being really low for a couple weeks. So--- yeah, maybe it wasn't the contest.

In positive news, I put some air in my bicycle tires and rode my bike again this week for the first time in months. I've also been doing a lot of work in the garden, taking out a tree, planting a vegetable garden and some flowers, pruning. I haven't been doing all that much exercise for the sake of exercise this week though.

I keep putting "GYM - non-negotiable" on my calendar, but then I don't end up going. I know that my health is on the line, and my $50 bet with my friends, etc etc, but somehow my motivation isn't totally there.

In the last week I *was* doing better with my diet though, I ended the week about 400 calories under budget and averaged 93 g of protein per day.

I am DETERMINED that this week is going to be better!!!!

Doing a little better (2011 week 13 update)

Last week I managed to stay under my colorie budget 4 out of 7 days. I averaged 91 g of protein per day. And I got an (loseit estimated) exercise calorie burn of about 900 from gardening, cleaning and walking. I didn't make it to the gym. And my overall weight is up about half a pound to 339.2.

I had an emotional session with my new counselor this afternoon and when I went to the grocery store afterward I bought mostly healthy food (salad ingredients, fruit, etc) but I also picked up ice cream, cookies, and chocolate milk. I had some of both the ice cream and cookies but I felt really sick afterward and they came back up again. Sorry if that's too graphic. I am probably going to toss the rest of both. I don't need that stuff around and it was a misguided impulse buy. Waste of money, waste of calories.

I am still kind of struggling with my mood. I stayed in bed until 12:30 this afternoon. I'm worried that they didn't call me back from an interview I had last Friday, and anxious about following up with them.

Just got to keep trying, keep moving forward.